DVD Review-The Drive In Collection and Massage Parlor Murders -Vinegar Syndrome


Review-Before I got into blogging, I was a huge fan of the music and movies. In the last few years when the death of the record store happened, I was the main person who cried and wondered if I bought more stuff would that help them. And now with the death of the video store, my heart is just destroyed. I know a lot of people will sit home and download stuff for free and think they are justified, but think about it because you did that we now have to go to Target, Wal Mart or a box in the middle of the road to have that once great experience. That being said, thank god for a company called Vinegar Syndrome even though it sounds like a weird new tampon, but these guys are out to make the drive in experience of yesteryear cool again. First and foremost before I start this review, I am not a major porn viewer. I have seen maybe ten or eleven films in my life, but if I am to watch porn it has to be something cutting edge or so odd that it is more for being shocked then being aroused. That being said, we are going back to the heyday of the 70’s when porn was about to be married to the trend of home video. Trust me, when the VCR boom started (even though for my money, I thought Beta was the better product), porn thrived. You got those people who did not want to go inside a seedy theater to watch films to go to a seedy video store to rent them. Do I wanted to start off my reviews with their adult offering.


The year is 1977 and we get Expectations, which is basically old school porn that shows us just how far porn has evolved. These days, we get tattoos and shaven women who look like sick Barbie dolls more than anything we would want to fantasize about. The storyline is porn 101, with one girl who is a woman who hates her life and is sexually doing without and one girl who is just the opposite. After a newspaper ad, the two even though they do not look the least bit alike decide to try and change places to see if the grass is greener on the other side. Like all these films with this subject matter there are rules in place, that eventually all are forgotten because the situation is better because of it. The majority of the film centers on the boring point of view of the socialite and what she seems to fall into. There are some key scenes that really deliver like the back and forth love scenes between the two women, the women themselves for the time are very attractive and will arouse the males. The male people in this film are your typical porn types which means they come across as stereotypes. The dialogue in the film is what you expect from 70’s porn, you had to remember this was before films like Taboo and High School Memories really made the films even more sexual with dialogue and scripts that made the viewer more anxious while waiting for the sex to happen. All in all, this was ok for the porn element. The love making scenes were very old school fun, and would make porn collectors happy they bought the collection. For new school porn fans that were raised on babysitters, 30 men gang bangs, bukkaki , Max Hardcore, Jim Powers and Extreme Associates you are going to be so letdown.

Confessions is up next and I have to be honest, this film is an absolute bore. Even the sex in the film came across as lame and boring. This film’s theme is around the same one of the last film, you have a bored woman who wants to spice up her life so she decides to become a hooker to different guys. Sounds like a Nikkatsu film, well even their films on this topic are better than this film. She wants to be this prostitute who does not care about the money, but does this more for the fucking and sexual experience. Married, single, mental or well hung does not matter to our hapless lady, she just wants to go into this world and dive head first. I would love to talk more and more about this film, but sadly this is all the film is about. The acting was horrid, the sex was boring and looked at times to be forced on the actors and actress, I get it this movie is trying to have someone live out their fetish, but still they could not have done better than this? Awful, awful film all the way around.

The dvd as a whole 6 out of 10 (Confessions gets a 4 out of 10…..Expectations gets a 7.5 out of 10)


Review-Next up from Vinegar Syndrome is a blu ray of a 70’s film that I knew nothing about or even heard of called Massage Parlor Murders. Originally this film was released in 1972 and then a few years later they re-released it with a more marketable name Massage Parlor Hookers. I have to say this film is absolutely an exploitation fan’s wetdream. This film is every bit as good as you will expect it to be, this film is so sleazy that you may have to take a bath afterwards to get the grime off you. This blu ray includes both the original and sex version of the film which for me doubles the fun. I was more inclined to watch the sex version first. This film revolves around some cops that hunt the streets looking for criminals; one of the cops is a regular at a local message parlor. One day his favorite girl is killed by an unknown criminal, and the cop loses it. This film is almost like Seven where it seems that the Killer is always one move ahead of the cops, and has no problem finding more victims. This is just a fun film, from start to finish you cannot go wrong with how fun this film is. Given that the script is mental and the acting is cheese, but that makes this film so much more fun. The transfer to blu ray is so well done, that I really cannot believe that this film is over 40 years old and finally gets a proper release. This film seems to be oddly familiar of the French Connection if it meshed with Fulci’s New York Ripper. This film is chock full of nudity, full of violence and definitely not for every movie fan. This is truly a clear example of them not making films like this anymore.

8.5 out of 10


Review-I have to be honest, this was the set I was looking to the most. Vinegar seems to be making its reputation off films that other studios sort of shy away from, and god bless them for that. They tend to venture off into lost genres or sleaze galore that make exploitation movie fans and just fans who crave the oddness really lose their wads over. I think as of this review, the film was pulled because of some issues, but I still feel the need to talk about it. That whole dialogue I just did aside, as much as I was excited about seeing this dvd set, I was so letdown by Savage Water, because it is the most boring, uninspiring and just plain horrible slasher horror film I have ever witnessed, well at least this week. Savage Waters tells the story of a bunch of people who go rafting, think Up The Creek and just as funny, well at least for me because I hated that film just as much as this. This film is filled with the 70’s stereotypes, the hippies or people who think Woodstock was still happening ten years later. This film was just awful, the acting was so amateur at best and that I think any of us could have made a better film with what the budget was for this film. Well according to Imdb amounted to a box of Kool’s and some Sunkist. There is this montage with a full on orchestra for this romantic deal that made no sense. This film is like a Ti West film, it takes more than 2/3rds of the film to get into anything being done or happening that will justify us watching it. Basically this film before that were nature shots and instructions on how to make out to an orchestra and use a life jacket. This film should never be seen, much less rented or even greenlit. It is just bad, very bad. The kills in this film, ummm…trust me, if I told you how bad they were it would not even matter, because I think you get the meaning of how awful this film is. This has to rank in my top 10 worst films I ever watched all the way thru. This is a zero, and I will not even bother putting a number on it down below.

This is the sad part of the review, because as bad as that film was Death by Invitation was really a good film. I really liked this film, and the sad part is I had to go thru hell to get to this gem. It centers on Lise who learns that her ancestor was burned at the stake as a witch. Now she is out to get revenge on those who killed her ancestor. Shelby Leverington plays Lise in her acting debut, and she is stunning and so excellent that I am just shocked that even though she has cameos today and does odd roles, that she never got to be huge. When they show the execution I admit it does look really cheaply and cheesy done. But, the music and mood of the scene really showcased the positives more and hid those negatives a little. We get a lot of acting talent all the way around, which I will admit this film is a slow burn and does take forever for things to happen, but the acting is so well done that you sort of want to see how this story builds.
The film has some blood and a little graphic material, which is always welcome but the production of the film and the transfer is really first rate and is so impressive. Like I will say again, the film is a very slow burn and probably would be more at ease being called a drama with horror elements than an actual horror film. But, this is a fine example that even 42 years ago they had a great idea how to make a very good indie film.

Death by Invitation 8 out of 10


Review-As my film fest is going on, I finally witnessed something that I knew was bound to happen when the transfers to the film really did not seem so special. Until getting into this collection, I really thought the transfer to what I have seen so far were good, this set however is not so good. This felt like an old taped over VHS transfer more than anything else, which sucks. The Suckers start off our set and this film is yet another version of Richard Connell’s most popular short story The Most Dangerous Game. The film takes that story though and adds a few twists to it, this time the rich guy is not so much hunting human beings as he is raping. This film is right up the alley of a sicko like me, it has a ton of sex and very violent scenes. This film is not for everyone, and may have inspired more films than Richard Connell’s story has. He has these models of a modeling company as his prey, but he feels that is not enough of a challenge for him so he kidnaps a green beret to be on their side. This film is just an awesome movie which I wish would have been on blu ray with a better transfer. The first hour of the film almost sets up the hunt, and the final act of the film is the action of the hunt and it is just top to bottom a fun film. You have the scenes that you know were made for a male audience like the lesbian stuff which goes into a past R level but not so sleazy into a XXX territory. I mean how many films are you going to see these days that are not porn that offer nipple sucking? This film is not for all movie fans, I think this film will speak more to fans of exploitation who love the old days of films and resents today films. What is not to love about this film, the acting is bad, the dialogue is a joke but the film just piles on what people care about the most, the sleaze. This film is a perverted view on what makes people want to buy up films like this, and pass on films coming out today.

This is just like the last set, you have one film that was really good and the second one that really fails. The Love Garden is not so much a total fail as it is a boring and just long winded romantic pile of shit. There is a guy living in an apartment and he notices a young woman and he wants her, and he stalks out to only find out she has a female lover. So this makes him want her even more, and he gives her a job helping him write, because he is an author. This way he can be closer to her, and you know that three is a crowd in these kinds of films. The film is talky, very talky to the point that you want to mute the television. The lesbian stuff in the film is ok to a point, and the girls are cute enough to get your attention. The film is just boring and I just say to all of you, if you watch this film just fast forward to the 25 minute mark and watch the lesbian stuff, because that is the only thing that is even worth talking about.

The dvd set-7.5 out of 10 ( The Love Garden a 2.5 and The Suckers was an 8..I know the rating should be lower, but I cannot let this shit film kill people watching The Suckers)


The final set I have to talk about is actually going back really old school. The late Boris Petroff’s 1961 film Anatomy of a Psycho. Ronnie Burns who stars in this film did you know he was the son of George Burns and Gracie Allen? I only knew this because my parents when I was a kid would watch their show in reruns. Ronnie stars as a kid who is borderline psycho before anything happens but once his brother goes to the gas chamber, the brother he used to look up to as a role model is now dead. It makes Ronnie snap even more, but we see his brother as what he truly was that Ronnie did not know about, which was a two bit thug and robber, who always looked for ways to cause harm. Now Ronnie’s character Mickey is out to avenge his brother’s death by harming all those who caused it. The film goes for about 75 minutes and it is harmless for what it is. It is by no means a masterpiece or even worthy of praising, but if you see it on television, you may be inclined to watch it just to see how bad it truly is. I would not say to buy this film, the acting, the dialogue and even the film as a whole was so underwhelming, but I would say this is like reality television, if it is on, watch it just do not tell anyone.

Our second feature is in B&W just like our first feature and it is from 1959. This is barely an hour long and The Lonely Sex is a film that tries early on to lure you in with the promise of nudity and sexual stuff, but fails to really deliver on that. This comes across more as a study into sex than a film of sex. The film centers on a guy who wanders the streets at night like he is a lost vagabond trying to come to terms with how he lost his virginity. He then decides to abduct a young woman to make his love. This often results in him drawing shit all over her face. And the funny thing is when she goes missing, no one really seems to care or notice. Director Richard Hilliard, who has made his reputation off of going against the norm, really tries hard in this film to straddle the art house with pure trash. The dialogue and talking is mostly voice overs and the film was ok in parts but at a hour seemed to overstay its welcome. All in all, this was ok to a point and like the film earlier on this same set, if you see it, fine if not do not make it a point to try and find it.

This set 5 out of 10