Movie Review-Cool As Hell


Cool as Hell is the latest film from James Balsamo, the film focuses on two roommates Rich and Benny. Rich manages a comic book store and seems to be a sad loser in life, he has trouble with women and he always gets picked on for his hair and his Hawaiian shirts. As the film gets going, we watch a demon attack a young woman, and Rich saves her. In saving this woman, the demon that is named Az is now a slave to him and is out to help Rich. One day, the girl of Rich’s dreams walks in the comic book store and steals his heart, it just so happens her boyfriend seems to be some kind of mobster/hitman who is violent towards everyone even his own girlfriend. While all this is going on, there is a portal that has now opened from hell and there is now walking amongst us a creature out to kill the world unless Rich can save us all.

I will say this; whether you love Balsamo or hate him you have to just admit the man has quite the imagination and creative drive to pull it off. The backstory to this film was done in a sing a long opening song that had us follow the lyrics with a skull leading the way. (Maybe a Nuclear Assault Critical Mass nod who can really say) We follow the story of Rich played by director Balsamo as he gets dogged out by every woman he tries to talk to, and any other person he encounters. One thing that Balsamo is really getting some attention for is all these cameos, some really cool and some just fucking bizarre. This film is no different, as we get more cameos then I can count and any film you can boast God Forbid, Raven and Tom Savini with so many more is something to really brag about.

Now, the cameos in the film are short and some of them are just passing thoughts or maybe a sentence. You can really tell Balsamo is such a geek for this stuff, esp. having Tommy Dreamer in a dream sequence teaching him how to defend himself with a kendo stick. With Balsamo, you are going to get the nudity, the juvenile offensive comedy and situations that are so absurd you know they can never happen but that is the beauty to watching this film. Why do horror films have to always be so serious? Why not have a comedy that appeals to the immaturity in all of us with horror touches in it? I thought the hitman in this film was gold, every time he opened his mouth it sounded like half of my relatives and had me laughing so hard, this dude just ran at the mouth and the shit that comes out will have you laughing and wishing he would not shut up.

Hack Job and I Spill Your Guts were the calm, this is the storm. No matter what mood you are in when you put this in your player, you will be in a different one when it ends, these guys bust their asses to get you guys to have fun and they pulled it off. What a really fun film. I learned watching this film if you have an allergy to strawberries, that you should never eat strawberry edible undies. And Balsamo also gives you love advice when women are into kinky things with you, like putting stuff on each other for foreplay. This Balsamo guy has some issues, and I am not talking about his hairdo and that Hawaiian shirt, let’s hope he does not get his issues solved. It is films like this that Hollywood does not have the fucking sack to even try to put out, but indie films are making them more and more and deserve to be noticed. This is one of those films that you do not get every day or gives you some done to death formula; this is a film that exists for the simple reason to entertain you. It is films like this that make me so proud of indie filmmaking, someone to put his heart and soul on the screen and gives you something to forget your problems and ills, and laugh at him.

8.5 out of 10