Movie Review-Immortals

Plot- A warrior in the making, Theseus is chosen by Zeus to lead the fight against the ruthless King Hyperion, who is on a rampage across Greece to obtain a weapon that can destroy humanity and find the virgin oracle. Directed by Tarsem Singh who gave us that J-Lo film called The Cell.

Review-If you are a fan of Greek Mythology, and are expecting this to be accurate retelling, you may not want to watch this film. This film seems to tell Greek Mythology, in a “that is close enough” state of mind. Which means they totally bastardize it. Do I blame 300, for films like this existing? Yes and no. Whereas a film like 300, at least gave us something solid in the way of storytelling and characters. 300, kept your interest and you rooted for your hero. With Immortals, there is just so much negative, that to harp on the negatives, seem like I am picking on a indie film that had a small budget. This film had the cash, the resources and had no reason to resort to this boring script and these bland characters to tell a story. It was like everyone involved in this film, closed their eyes, and said ” release it, and let us think of a home video release date after the first weekend box office gross” The positives, I did not mind Mickey Rourke who played King Hyperion. Given, this is not his best work or even close to being a good role for him. But, for what he was given, I did not mind him. This film had a lot worst problems than his acting. I am starting to think you can give Mickey Rourke a paper bag to co star with him, and he could make the paper bag at least watchable. The visuals are stunning. Now the CGI is so 300/Sin City inspired, and over the top. Which I did not mind in a few scenes. (A note to any director, if you are going to bastardize anything or create a big mess out of history, at least could you make it beautiful to look at?) This film was beautiful to look at. Not much more to recommend. The negatives, well it is basically the rest of the film. Henry Cavill as lead character Theseus was awful, almost painful to watch. I don’t know if it was the actor or the script, but the character was so bland and boring that you could not even feel inspired. Even when he is rallying the troops with his speech, I almost felt like just muting the tv. The fight scenes for the most part were amazingly choreographed, so much so, you could tell they were. It almost felt like fighting in a dance troupe production. Ok guys, punch one two three, kick one two three, sword one two three. Even the scene, where Mickey Rourke kills Henry’s mom in front of him, just seemed so bland and pointless. What is up with the God’s and those gold singlet outfits? They looked ridiculous. And the finale fight scene, why fight in a badly lit area with both sides almost dressed the same? This film felt like a boat trying to set sail with holes all over it.

I am sick of 3D. I know the box office has felt the sting of a very bad recession, but why keep price gouging fans and make films that really do not need to be 3D, 3D. A film like this has absolutely no purpose to be 3D, other than trying to get back most of its budget off the gimmick, rather than trying to get the cash back off quality or star power. And people are bitching at horror films for cashing in and over-using 3D. This film, I tried..I really tried. Mickey Rourke, I know you are riding that wave from The Wrestler and cashing in on anything, but even you had to know that this was a bad decision. Since you are in such a great mood and want to make films just for pay-days–What about a Johnny Handsome 2? There is breaking news for Wicked Channel readers. You read it here first.

2 out of 10

  • Riley

    I wasn’t disappointed by the graphics og Immortals, but as for the story, it could have been better. I did enjoy watching the movie in theaters, and I’m going to rent it from Blockbuster in a little bit. I have the option of having the Blu-Ray sent to my home with Blockbuster @Home, but I am going to rent it from the store, just so I don’t have to wait on the mail. I like having Blockbuster @Home because it also gives me the option to stream different movies to my laptop or iPad anywhere I am, such as at DISH where I work or at school waiting for class to start. I’m really looking forward to seeing Immortals in beautiful HD.