The Abducted

Originally titled Match: Dead. This is the new film from Brain Damage. Review over. I am joking seriously. To tell you the truth, Brain Damage could not make a good film to save their fucking lives. I call Nightmare Alley the fluke. This film is the most boring crap I have seen in quite a long long time. This film is all about Valora Smith and her captor Ridley. Supposedly meeting on the internet, ( what a original concept) this film is all about a long winded conversation that is often distracted with flashbacks of Valora and her grandfather teaching her how to kill animals, shoot cans and fight. You know by the trailer, that she turns the tables on him. This takes place at about the 69 minute mark of a 82 minute film.

The grandfather is a joke. He comes to try and rescue her and it is so damn stupid I could laugh. The characters were so bland. Fuck you have a hot chick in the film and you could not even make her matter. The dialogue just went on and on, to the point I wanted to be abducted just to make this film end. I almost nodded at least 3 times. And come on, you have a hot chick who is tied up. No sexual situations or nudity. Just endless chatter. Oh, my bad we get to see dude naked showering. I want sick shit, I get to see what 1 finger cut off and one shot off..oh boy.. I wanted something that would put life into this dull shit. Brain Damage films, I wont even admit Nightmare Alley is part of their library. I dare anyone at this studio give me a film that will make me a fan. i am easy to please..The best part of this film was when the credits hit. The worst film I have been asked to review to date. ( yes Cinema Epoch worst than the mega shitz epic known as Psycho Shark)

I wont give it a 1 out of 10..let me just pretend I did not watch it.

  • For a film like this to work, the concept has to work. You have to be into the story. I made a very brief mention of nudity in the review, and the only reason why is what we did we get in this film..a hot woman tied up and the guy naked. This is another example of Brain Damage just insulting fans. We have had how many of these films? At least do something sort of original with the concept. This was like a cruel joke to horror fans. Could you picture looking at the cover you have a cute girl who is bound and gagged, and you buy this for what 24.95 and you watch this whole film and this is what you get..I need this film to be good, I need Brain Damage to succeed. This is not the way to do it. Thanks for checking out my review….

  • Justin

    Just watched this for review purposes and I was honestly wondering why people hated it so much. I read your review and I think I got my answer. Anyone who’d rather see tits than hear dialogue and reasoning behind the actions on screen would of course find this to be a boring film. I’m not saying it was great, there were a shit ton of problems, but it really wasn’t that bad. Tits and Ass do not make a good movie. If that’s all you want, why aren’t you just reviewing porn? Given the title of the film you have to know what to expect, especially given the low budget horror schlock nature of it. That being said, they added a Western aspect to this one and even the idea of new school vs. old school in the West, something a little more artsy than you usually find in a shitty horror flick. Point is, there’s way more to this movie than you’ve given it credit for. I OFFICIALLY DISAGREE, SIR! 😛